


Obsession

by cadkitten



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Explicit Language, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-06-26
Updated: 2007-06-26
Packaged: 2017-11-13 23:03:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/508675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadkitten/pseuds/cadkitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reita has an obsession... a dream if you may. Aoi stumbles into the truth and turns everything upside down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Obsession

**Author's Note:**

> For 50 stories 018: Dream

Reita slowly pushed his blonde hair back from out of his eyes, allowing himself to glare heatedly at Aoi. "What in the fuck do you mean by that?!"

Aoi snorted loudly and marched over to the bassist's wooden storage cabinet. Without hesitation he threw open the door and jabbed a finger accusingly at the second shelf. " _That_ is what I'm talking about. You're obsessed!" He laughed bitterly, "Just like all those fangirls out there. You're just like them and don't you dare try to deny it!"

Reita's jaw dropped for an instant before he clamped it shut and raised his gaze to meet Aoi's. "I am not like _them_."

"Oh yeah? Watch this." Aoi reached into the cabinet and pulled out a stack of magazine clippings. He marched over to where Reita was standing and threw them on the low table in front of him. Several hundred clippings went fluttering around the table and the floor beneath it.

Almost immediately Reita was on his knees attempting to pick them up, being extremely careful not to crumple any of them. "What did you do that for?!" His voice raised an octave or so, slight panic evident in it.

Aoi snorted again and marched back over to the cabinet. This time he pulled out several thick photo books, a few DVDs and as many CDs as he could handle at once. He walked back over to the table and dumped his armload on top of the pictures Reita had yet to pick up.

The bassist let out a horrified squeal and tried to catch all the items at once. Of course, not being an octopus or something of that nature, he failed miserably and most everything ended up in a haphazard pile on the table. He stared up at Aoi, thinking for sure his friend and band mate must have lost his mind. "Please... please stop."

"I'm not done proving my point." Aoi turned on his heel and headed off toward Reita's bedroom.

Reita jumped up from the floor and ran down the hall. He shoved Aoi out of the way and barred the guitarist's way into his bedroom. "No! Stop it right now!" His normally calm eyes held a flame of something akin to terror in their depths as he stared at his normally rational friend. "I won't let you touch Die!"

Aoi arched an eyebrow at him. "See... this is what I'm talking about, Rei..." he sighed. "This has to stop. You're so obsessed with the guy that you have his face plastered all over your bedroom and now you're talking about the posters as if they're really him! You're starting to worry me."

Reita bit his lip for a moment and then hung his head, stepping out of the way of the guitarist. "Go ahead then... crush my dream like it's nothing."

Aoi stared at the bassist, mild shock registering on his face. "Your dream?"

Reita nodded and slid down the wall and into the floor. His voice was barely above a whisper when he spoke again and Aoi had to crouch beside of him in order to hear him. "I... I met him once, you know."

The guitarist shook his head. "No, I didn't."

"Well, I did. We both happened to be in this nightclub a few months ago. He hit on me one night, originally thinking I was a girl." He laughed softly. "When I turned around and he realized that he had his hand on my ass and I wasn't a girl, the look on his face was priceless. It took me a minute and then I realized who he was and I think I almost had a heart attack." He grinned sheepishly. "He apologized and I told him it was alright, I didn't mind. We ended up talking for the rest of the night. It was pretty late and I got up and went to the bathroom. It took me a while because of the end of the night line and when I came back, he was gone..." he shook his head and stared down at his hands, "I... I guess I just can't forget how nice it was to talk to him..."

Aoi was quiet for a minute and then shook his head. "It's more than that."

Reita looked up at Aoi, surprise written in his eyes. "I..." he swallowed hard and looked away, almost frantically shaking his head.

"You can't deny it... can you?"

Reita remained silent for quite a while, with his head bowed and his face hidden from his friend. When he looked back up, his cheeks were streaked with evidence of tears. His voice wavered when he spoke, holding a note of fear that ran so deep it almost hurt to hear him speak. "I never meant for it to be like this." He let out a choked sob and buried his head in his hands. "I... by the end of the night... I..." another sob and he shook his head hard.

Aoi moved closer and rested a comforting hand against the bassist's back. "It's okay, you can tell me. Whatever it is, I'll always be right here, Rei... right beside you, no matter what."

Reita leaned into Aoi's arms and leaned his head against his shoulder. "I... I _wanted_ him to hit on me again. I wanted him to be there when I came back. And worse..." he shook his head slightly again, "I came back to the table having worked up the nerve to ask him back here for the night." By the time he was done with his confession, he was shaking like a leaf.

Aoi simply held him tightly in his arms for a while before he replied. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Reita leaned up enough to look into Aoi's eyes. "Tell you what? I didn't think you really wanted to know who I met at a night club."

The guitarist shook his head. "That's not what I mean, Rei. I mean about your sexual preferences."

Reita's eyes widened slightly and he frantically shook his head. "D-don't get the wrong idea!" He quickly pulled back from Aoi and put a significant distance between himself and the guitarist. "I... it's not what you think. I swear!"

Aoi's tongue darted out, dragging hastily over his lip ring and then disappearing back into his mouth. "How do you know what I think exactly?"

The bassist shook his head and scrambled to his feet. He pressed his back up against the far wall and stared down at his feet. "I... I'm not gay and I've never even thought of another guy like that before!" His eyes widened and he clamped a hand over his mouth. 'Oh shit...'

Aoi gave him a crooked smile as he raised himself to his feet. "I never said you were. I've seen the number of girls you've brought home over the years and not once have I ever seen you take a guy home or hit on one, not even when you were so trashed your eyes were practically crossed. All I meant was that you are, at the very least, bi-curious. And frankly, that's not so uncommon these days. Hell, it's hard not to be that way when you're in our line of work. We've all kissed another guy on stage, or at least done something remotely lewd with another guy. I don't see how you could possibly not be curious after all of that." He gave Reita another lopsided grin. "Even I'm more curious than I'd like to admit."

Reita seemed to visibly relax at the last statement, even allowing a soft sigh to pass his lips. "I just... I don't know. It felt different... almost like it was right... more right than any other time I've ever been hit on. And I was completely okay with it; even from the moment I turned around and saw him. I started collecting all this Dir en grey stuff hoping it would satiate whatever he made me feel by doing that. I've gone to write him so many times through their fan email addresses, but I always chicken out when I'm about to hit the send button. Nothing ever sounds right and I feel like I end up coming across as desperate or even crazy. I don't want him to think..." he sighed, "I guess I don't even want him to think that I want what I do. When I go to say it, it all sounds so wrong; like I'm confessing something more than I am." He stared at Aoi. "What if he doesn't even remember who I am? How foolish would I feel then?"

Aoi shook his head. "You're pretty hard to forget, Reita. I can't say why he bailed when you were in the bathroom. Maybe he thought you had left or maybe he sensed what you were going to do and didn't know what else to do but hide from it or maybe he just had to leave. You don't know any of that. If he thinks you're crazy for how you feel, for what you thought you felt that night, then well, at least you'll know for sure if you tell him... right?"

"It seems so impersonal to do it in an email."

Aoi shrugged. "So ask our manager for their manager's phone number. Then tell their manager who you are and ask him to have Die call you and leave your number."

Reita sagged to the floor again and sat there for a minute before speaking again. "Take all of this stuff except the DVDs and CDs, Aoi. Take it all and store it away somewhere. If things don't work out, I'll want them back. Otherwise, I'll sell them all online and donate the money somewhere or something."

"So you'll call then?"

Reita nodded. "I'll call."


End file.
